The Old Fogies go to Bergen in Norway


Of all the ports we visited on our cruise, there was only one that we had visited before. We had a few days in Bergen around 14 years ago and had thoroughly enjoyed our visit. Back on our first visit we had taken the train up to Myrdal and down to Flam which is considered one of the most picturesque train journeys in the world. From Flam we took a fast cat ferry along the Sognefjord before coming back to Bergen.


On this visit we were going to concentrate on the city itself and consider any of the changes that had taken place since we were last there. Bergen is the second-largest city in Norway with population of around 420,000 inhabitants. It served as Norway’s capital in the 13th century, and from the end of the 13th century became a an important city of the Hanseatic League. Its wooden houses may look picturesque but Bergen has suffered catastrophic fires throughout its history.


We assembled on deck from early morning and enjoyed the stunning but rather precarious journey into Bergen. Houses and small homesteads dotted the islands surrounding the opening to the port.


Bergen was a popular stopping off point for cruise ships back in our first visit, however it was only the odd one or two, as we approached the port there were at least four in port already.


Because there was many ships in, we knew from past experience that the queues for the Fløibanen funicular which runs from the city centre to Mount Fløyen would be long and because we had already been up there, we decided to give it a miss.


The panoramic views from the top of the mount are great in good weather but in overcast conditions the visibility is quite poor. A few miles out of town is the Ulriksbanen aerial tramway which runs to Mount Ulriken.


Our main memories from our previous trip was the old Bryggen warehouses which are a World Heritage Site and the interesting market that included stalls selling whale meat and furs from a variety of animals. It did at the time seem that Bergen was on the edge of wilderness and very unusual.


As we walked down to the Bryggen warehouse, we were surprised at the sheer number of people and made a detour to the market. The market still had a few stalls selling a variety of meats including whale, moose and reindeer but they were all packaged for visitors not for locals. The variety of stalls was limited to food outlets and Norway souvenirs.


We were both a little disappointed with these changes, so decided to walk along the other side of the dock to the less commercial side and where we had stayed on our last visit. One of favourite places to sit on the last visit was a small promontory which had a large totem pole which was a gift of friendship from the city of Seattle on the city’s 900th anniversary in 1970. Mrs Nice come into her own with her directions and we sat and enjoyed a drink and a bite to eat.

After our enjoyable picnic, we began to walk back via a few sights, the first attraction was Bergen Aquarium, we did not have time to go inside but looked inside the Aquarium shop that had a comical large penguin and polar bear. Mrs Nice was taken by a fluffy white seal soft toy, ‘the girls would love these’ she said. Knowing it would be foolish to argue we bought the toys and moved on.


We walked past some old wooden houses leading to the water and the Nykirken church before finding our way to the cultural centre of Bergen, Two internationally renowned composers who came from Bergen are Edvard Grieg and Ole Bull.


There is a number of Grieg statues around including near the Logen theatre, there is also quite strange statue of Henrik Ibsen one of Norway’s most famous playwrights. New since our last visit was the Kode art galleries which are near the bandstand and small water feature. Crossing over near to the Bryggen, we went past the Hanseatic Museum which documents the city’s Hanseatic heritage.


The Bryggen warehouses are geared towards the tourist market and draws customers in with strange little northern scenes or lifesize stuffed animals like polar bears, moose and reindeer. Mrs Nice noticed that one shop was having closing down sale and said let’s see if there are any bargains, I raised my eyebrows to show my disapproval but stumbled into the shop. I had to admit the prices were not outrageously expensive and even saw a bargain for myself. Mrs Nice tried on a multicoloured woollen coat which looked expensive, it Ok it’s half price she smiled. So there it was, one of the biggest surprises in a trip to Norway, we actually bagged ourselves a bargain each.


Making our way back to the ship, we made a slight detour to two very old stone buildings, the Hakonshallen and Rosenkranz Tower, both reminders of the city’s Viking and Norse past.

Returning to Bergen left us with mixed emotions, we both believed that it had lost some of its naïve charm and catered more for the boatloads of visitors rather than for locals. It is a victim of its own success and is one of the most visited cruise ports in the world. However it still is one of the most picturesque cities in Europe amongst some of the most dramatic scenery.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.


The Old Fogies go to Sortland in Norway



Our next stop was the small town of Sortland in Norway which is one of the major towns of the Vesterålen. The Vesterålen Islands are located near the Lofoten Islands which created a stunning backdrop on the approach to Sortland.


The snow on the peaks of some of the mountains were some indication of the wildness and remoteness of these particular islands and the scenery was spectacular as we made our way to the turning into the approach for Sortland. That said there were a number of small number of homesteads and towns as we entered the fjord into the approach to Sortland.


Sortland is the largest commercial centre in Vesterålen. Sortland is located close to the Sortland Bridge, which connects the islands of Langøya to Hinnøya by road. Since a lot of houses in the town are painted blue, Sortland is sometimes referred to as “the blue city”. Sortland district has a population of around 10,000 with around 5,000 living in the town.


As we approached Sortland , the famous Hurtigrutan ferry was making its way out, the ferries make their journey up the Norwegian coastline in all weathers and have become a legendary 11-day voyage.


After the stunning scenery, Sortland is a bit of anti-climax, however it is worth remembering that Sortland is not on many cruise itinerary therefore is not really geared up the tourists who stop off for a few hours but rather those who want to go hiking, skiing, nature safari’s and those looking for the Northern lights.


The Vesterålen islands were connected to each other by several bridges and Sortland´s place is the main retail area in the area. For a very small place it does a number of shopping centres and a large cultural centre.


Our first stop in the town was the striking white church which was built-in 1901, inside a kindly gentlemen handed out postcards and invited us to explore the simple but attractive church.


The name Ellingsen often appears, they were obviously important people here and we gathered that the Ellingsen family of Sortland had farmed and ran businesses in the area for 200 years. There were two large tombstones in the old churchyard and a statue to one of the family in the main square near the culture centre.


We then made our way into the town to indulge in a little retail therapy until Mrs Nice saw the prices. For a small place it did have a lot of amenities for the local population especially the younger people who can be often isolated in these small places.


One interesting statue was in the city centre which was of the local cleaner who had cleaned the streets of Sortland for 30 years. You did not usually see bronze statues to public servants and we thought it was a very touching tribute to a local character.


We then made our way to have a closer look at the Sortland Bridge which elegantly spanned the water between Langøya to Hinnøya. As we sat there eating our picnic, the weather dramatically changed from a bright sunny day to a cloudy overcast one. The hills and mountains that sparkled with sunshine on our arrival began to look dark and foreboding.


It was time head back to the boat, however there was one final surprise before we reached the port. A small blue military building complex had signs forbidding photography in Norwegian, English and Russian. I had a vision of a Russian spy walking up to the building and reading the notice and then deciding not to take photographs. Like a good law-abiding gentleman, I put my camera away and did not take any photographs.


Near the boat was large blades for the large wind turbines that were on the top of the hill but were not yet in operation.

One fascinating part of this journey is to visit places often a long way off the main tourist trail where the conditions are difficult and the population are more interested in enjoying the summer and surviving the winter than just catering for thousands of tourists.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.

The Old Fogies go to Honningsvåg in Norway



We had finally reached the northern edges of the European coast and was now in the Barents sea, enjoying the spectacular Norwegian coastline. Our last stop before Russia was the small city of Honningsvåg .


Honningsvåg is the northernmost city in Norway. It is very unusual because legislation effective in 1997 states that a Norwegian city/town must have at least 5,000 inhabitants, but Honningsvåg was declared a city in 1996, thus exempt from this legislation, so it is also one of the smallest cities in Norway.


In reality it is a small fishing village which is famous as the dropping off point for visitors who want visit North Cape which is a tourist attraction on the northern tip of the European mainland. It’s claim to fame is that it is the northernmost point in Europe but the reality is that it is not, that title goes to nearby Knivskjellodden.


However that has not stopped busloads of visitors from taking the ride from Honningsvåg and the North Cape attraction organisers to charge visitors £19 to enter the complex. If it had been the northernmost point, we may have decided to join the tourist crush, however it isn’t so we decided to investigate this charming little fishing city.


When we get off the boat, we are surprised to see a life size statue of a St Bernard Dog, reading the information board gave us some information about this remarkable animal. The dog was called Bamse and he was the mascot of the Free Norwegian Forces during the Second World War and a symbol of Norwegian freedom during the war. In its early days, the dog was a well known character in pre-war Honningsvåg before joining its owner on Royal Norwegian Navy as a coastal patrol vessel. When the Germans overran Norway, the vessel and Bamse moved to Scotland stationed in Montrose and Dundee. Bamse became a celebrity to the local Scottish population and often rounded up the Norwegian sailors from the local pub and escorted them back to his boat. When Bamse died in 1944, he was buried with full military honours. Hundreds of Norwegian sailors, Allied servicemen, schoolchildren and people from Montrose and Dundee attended his funeral.

In 2006, a larger than life sized bronze statue of Bamse, made by Scottish sculptor Alan Herriot was unveiled in Montrose. A copy of that statue was commissioned and in 2009 with hundreds in attendance, the statue was unveiled on Honningsvåg harbour.


When we entered Honningsvåg it was teeming with birdlife over the cliffs and on the waterfront and when we set out to walk through the town it was only the sound of birds that you could here.


We slowly made our way past the closed shops to the small Honningsvåg church on the hill, built in 1885, it was one of only twelve churches in Northern Norway that escaped destruction by the Germans in the Second World War. As we sat on a small bench within the small cemetery attached to the church, even the sound of the birds had disappeared.

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The silence was deafening and quite eerie as we looked at the small but beautifully formed gravestones. How many souls beneath our feet had been born and lived their entire lives in this northern outpost ?


As we walked quietly passed the small wooden buildings, we began to notice that the local population displayed their sense of humour with interesting little figures dotted here and there.


There was dressed little trolls, stone people and dolls in a little window box. Many of the gardens have flowers or colourful furniture, even the main street had an interesting selection of plants in wellington boots.


Honnigsvag certainly had a quirky quality that added to its picturesque setting and has we made our way to the harbour we could see it was a working port.


There were plenty of small to medium size boats which are used to fish the rich fertile waters of the Arctic Circle. Honningsvåg is considered one of the busiest fishing ports in Norway.


The waters are remarkably clear and Mrs Nice was quite excited by all the starfish in the harbour.


Honningsvåg does have a few other attractions including a small NordKapp museum and Icebar with gift shop where a massive husky stood guard. But we were content to get away from the crowds and take a little piece of downtime enjoying the (city) and the wonderful scenery.


Whilst enjoying the late summer sunshine, we noticed the arrival of one of the Hurtigruten coastal ships, these ships have been a familiar sight on our travels up the Norwegian coast and Honningsvåg is one of the main stops before Kirkenes in the north.


Honningsvåg may be seen as a gateway to North Cape but possesses a charm all of its own. The local population take a lot of pride in their houses and town and display a quirky sense of humour which no doubt brighten up the cold winter days.


It is a place to enjoy the birdlife and scenery in a peaceful setting without too many distractions.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.

The Old Fogies go to Tromsø in Norway

Our arrival in Tromsø was even more spectacular than our arrival in Trondheim with stunning scenery and passing under the bridge,  we were now well inside of the Arctic Circle and Tromsø is one of the major northern cities.


Like many places in the far north, Tromsø was occupied by the Vikings in the 7–8th Centuries but there is evidence that people lived here over 10,000 years ago. This area has also been the home of the Sami for centuries.


Tromsø was issued its city charter in 1794 by King Christian VII and gained in importance due to fishing and hunting for furs. By the end of the 19th century, Tromsø became a major Arctic trade centre from which many Arctic expeditions originated. Explorers like Roald Amundsen, Umberto Nobile and Fridtjof Nansen often recruited their crews in the city.


When Germany invaded Norway in 1940, Tromsø served briefly as the seat of the Norwegian government. In nearby Tromsøy island, the German battleship Tirpitz was sunk by the RAF off the Tromsøy island in 1944, killing close to 1,000 German sailors.

The population of Tromsø municipality today is around 70,000 and despite its location it is an increasingly popular place to live with plenty of bars, restaurants and cafes to cater for the locals and a lively student population. 


We arrived fairly early in the morning and the deserted streets gave us the opportunity to explore before the city comes to life. Like Trondheim, Tromsø has lots of picturesque wooden buildings and has one of the largest wooden cathedrals in Norway. Interesting travel fact, the city centre of Tromsø contains the highest number of old wooden houses in Northern Norway, the oldest house dating from 1789.


Talking of cathedrals, we were anxious to visit the Arctic Cathedral which involved crossing over the river. The Arctic cathedral is a major landmark of the city and is easily seen from many vantage points in the city. From a distance it does not look that large, however when you get closer you begin to understand its scale.


Mrs Nice mentioned that it does look a little like Sydney Opera House and you could see some similarities. Unfortunately the cathedral was not open but peering through the window, you could see the magnificent stain glass window and the simple layout of the church. Whilst on this side of the river, you can go to the Fjellheisen cable car that will take to the top of Mount Storsteinen. With limited time we decided to decline this attraction to explore the main city.


 The centre of the city is located around the large wooden Lutheran cathedral and the statue of Amundsen with the cultural centre close by. The main square was set up for a concert, Tromso has produced a number of famous rock stars and has a number of festivals throughout the year.


The quiet start to the day was now gone and locals began to fill the main shopping areas mingling with visitors. For a small place, Tromso seemed to have large number of hotels in the centre which is perhaps an indication of its popularity.


Up the hill slightly is the wooden Catholic cathedral which was built at the same time as the Lutheran one which was probably part of a battle for the local souls in the 19th century. The cathedral was a bit of a surprise inside being blue and white with little of the ornamentation you associate with Catholic churches. There was also a series of symbols on the ceilings that was rather unusual.


 Deciding it was time for a break we headed for the northernmost branch of Burger King, we are not usually great fans of burger joints, however after the rather rich food of the ship we thought it was a pleasant change. Obviously fast food means something different up in the frozen north because it 20 mins for our meals to be produced.

 How much was that? I asked Mrs Nice, don’t ask she replied before I saw the bill for around £16. Coming from London we are used to expensive food and drink but Norway takes it to a different level, if you ever come to Norway be aware of the high price of particularly everything.


One location I was looking forward to seeing was Olhallen which is the city’s oldest pubs and one of most famous pubs in Norway and is attached to one of the northernmost breweries in the world. After a walk along the Storgata, we found the pub which is attached to the famous Mack Brewery established in 1872.


Mrs Nice went inside to get a drink as i found a table outside, suddenly Mrs Nice appeared and said you must come inside, there is a polar bear in here. Intrigued, I followed her in the pub and there was indeed a life-size (around nine feet) stuffed polar bear. Looking around the inside of the very attractive and interesting pub we decided to find a seat and enjoy the ambience. Mrs Nice came back with two halves of Mack’s Pilsner and we settled down to enjoy our drink. It was obvious to the various languages being spoken and photographs being taken that the pub is a bit of pilgrimage for beer drinkers and it certainly does not disappoint with lovely wooden fittings and plenty of pictures and other paraphernalia on the wall.


Our next stop was the nearby Polaria museum in the most unusual shaped building; it looks like a row of books toppling over. Nearby was the historic sealing vessel MS Polstjerna.  We visited a number of arctic type museums when we were in Bergen and Oslo some years ago, so did not feel the need to reminded that the Arctic is a cold and hostile place.


On the other side of the city, we had seen the Polar Museum which was in an attractive old building with a number of items outside.

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By now, the city was really coming alive with buskers on the main streets and plenty of shopping activity, it was nice to see that many of the shops were local not global luxury brands, although the prices were probably have been roughly the same.

 Although Tromsø is in the Arctic Circle it seems to be thriving with lots of places to eat and drink, hotels, shops and cultural events. On a bright summer’s day, everyone was enjoying the sunshine, however it might be a different story in the winter with the cold polar days, although strangely the city does not suffer from extreme cold associated with this latitude very often due to the warming effect of the Gulf Stream.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.

The Old Fogies go to Trondheim in Norway



Many years ago we had visited Bergen and we both said we would like to explore the more northern part of Norway. Well that day had finally arrived with our leisurely arrival in Trondheim travelling along the scenic Trondheim Fjord. The city of Trondheim is the third largest city in Norway with a population of around 170,000. The city has a long history with a settlement being founded in 997 and Trondheim served as the capital of Norway during the Viking Age until 1217.


Trondheim is also a popular spot for cruise ships and has we approached, one large cruise ship had already docked and there was one behind us. Near to the entrance is the small islet called Munkholmen which is now a popular tourist attraction. The islet has served in the past as a place of execution, a monastery, a fortress and a prison (presumably a sort of mini Alcatraz).


The ship berthed around a mile from the city centre and the walk took us amongst some of the picturesque wooden buildings that are a common feature in Trondheim. Our plan was to walk to the Kristiansten Fortress, which was built in 1681–1684 and is located on a hill east in Trondheim.


Arriving at Gamle Bybro (the Old Town Bridge) we crossed to make the ascent to the top, the climb was steep but relatively short. We noticed on the way the rather novel seats and the interesting bicycle lift that took riders up to the top.


The fortress was less of a castle but more of a fortified building at the top and other fortifications underneath the grassy top. The fortress repelled the invading Swedes in 1718, but was decommissioned in 1816. However it does have a grim side to its history, the fortress was used by the Nazi forces during World War II and 23 Norwegian resistance fighters were executed by the Nazi forces inside the fortress.


There is a few attractions inside the fortress but we were content to sit and enjoy the spectacular views over Trondheim and its surroundings, the fjord and the mountains.

Gradually we made our way back down the steep hill back to the Gamle Bybro (The Old Town Bridge) which was first built on this site in 1681 at the same time as the Kristiansten Fort was constructed.


Near to the bridge are the very picturesque historic wharves warehouses and boathouses that stand near the mouth of the Nidelva river. Less known than the ones in Bergen, the old wharf buildings have been preserved with the oldest dating back to the 18th century.


From the bridge we took the route along the old cobbled streets flanked by wooden buildings which are now shops, restaurants and bars to Nedre Elvehavn that has been recently redeveloped with a shopping centre which incorporated some of the old buildings, restaurants and bars.


Undoubtedly the main attraction in Trondheim is Nidaros Cathedral, the Cathedral is the world’s northernmost gothic cathedral. Built from 1070 over the tomb of St. Olav, the Viking king who brought Christianity to Norway, the cathedral was completed around 1300.


The cathedral is considered Northern Europe’s most important Christian pilgrimage site during the Middle Ages with pilgrimage routes leading to it from Oslo and many other places in Sweden, Norway and beyond. 


The cathedral is part of a complex that also includes the Archbishop’s Palace and museum where you can see the Crown Regalia of Norway.


Also in the complex is the small but fascinating Armory and Resistance Museum, emphasizing Trondheim military history from Viking times up to the story of the Norwegian resistance in the Second World War.


Other places of interest include Vår Frue Kirke (The Church of Our Lady) which is one of Trondheim’s oldest buildings. Stiftsgården is the royal residence in Trondheim, originally constructed in 1774. At 140 rooms constituting 4,000 square metres (43,056 sq ft), it is possibly the largest wooden building in Northern Europe, and has been used by royals and their guests since 1800. There is a statue of Olav Tryggvason, the founder of Trondheim, in the city’s central square, which is now unfortunately surrounded by roadworks.


The small fish market is interesting not just for the variety of seafood but the rather eclectic collection of objects which included stuffed animals, old motors and other fishing memorabilia.


Walking back to the ship we came across a marina that was holding a show with plenty of people looking at strange old engines. Even stranger in the docks area was an alleyway in which the artists were working on large pieces of street art. 


Trondheim is a fascinating place to visit in a stunning location, many of the sights you can see in a day but it would also be a useful base to explore more of the incredible natural features around this part of Norway.


As well as the major attractions, the city is fascinating to walk around with lots of picturesque wooden buildings and quirky little shops hiding away in basements and narrow alleys. 

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.


The Old Fogies go to Kirkwall in the Orkney Islands



On the day of our arrival into Orkney waters, there was a mist over the hills but it quickly became clear that the various islands that make up the Orkneys are sparsely populated with small areas of buildings and large areas given over to farming.


Our destination was the Orkney capital, Kirkwall which is by far the largest town in the islands. The Kirkwall’s skyline is dominated by the St Magnus Cathedral known as ‘The Light of the North’. Orkney’s ancient capital can be traced back to Norse times in the 11th century when it was called Kirkjuvagr. For centuries, Orkney was under Norwegian jurisdiction, before becoming part of Scotland in the 15th century.

Although Orkney may seem remote to the rest of Europe, people have been living here for at least 10,000 years. In recent times, archaeologists have found ceremonial stone circles, tombs, prehistoric villages and many other ancient monuments.


 A shuttle bus took us on a short ride from the Liner terminal to Kirkwall and we began to explore some of the narrow streets in the town. One of the streets took us to the harbour which is still very much a working harbour with fishing boats, small boats and ferries.


The waterfront has a small number of hotels, bars and restaurants, behind the waterfront is a number of small shopping streets. Orkney’s shopping streets are refreshingly free from the usual high street names and celebrates the island’s creative community with local jewellery, arts, crafts and contemporary fashion shops.


 It was still relatively early with most of the shops and attractions closed, so we decided to take a small detour out of town to an area that is famous with its scenery and its part in British and German Naval history.

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Taking the road out of town, we then joined the Crantit Trail which took us through some of the scenic countryside full of sheep, cows, horses and wildlife. After around 40 minutes walking we found ourselves at Scapa beach overlooking the famous Scapa Flow.


Scapa Flow is a wonderful large natural harbour surrounded by islands, it was from here in 1916 that  Admiral Sir John Jellicoe led the Royal Navy’s Grand Fleet to the Battle of Jutland, the largest naval engagement of the First World War. Scapa Flow was home to the British Home Fleet during both World Wars, it was also here in 1918 that the German High Seas Fleet was interned after the Armistice and then was scuttled in 1919.


Not far from the beach was where a German U-boat in 1939 launched a torpedo attack on HMS Royal Oak with the loss of 833 crew. Near the beach there are a number of memorials to this tragedy and are a grim reminder that the idyllic scene in front of us was not always so.


Also near to the beach is the Scapa Distillery which produces a single malt whisky, less known than the nearby Highland Park Distillery, the Scapa Distillery was founded in 1885.


After a very short stay, we decided to take the local bus back into Kirkwall. A trip on the local bus is always a good way to see areas a bit off the tourist trail and an opportunity to chat with the locals.

Back in town, the quiet morning had given way to a bustling town centre as locals and visitors were mingling in the shopping streets and at the attractions.

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St Magnus Cathedral is probably  Kirkwall’s ‘must see’ attraction. It is the most northerly cathedral in Britain and was started in 1137 at a time when Orkney was ruled by the Vikings. A stone minster was founded by Earl Rognvald in memory of his uncle St Magnus who was martyred on the island of Egilsay. Inside it is a fascinating mix of museum and cathedral with a leaflet that points out some of the key artefacts.

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Equally interesting is the Orkney museum which is set in an large old building called Tankerness House, it tells the story of the Orkney’s from Neolithic times up to the present day.

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In the town centre is the large stone Earl’s and Bishop’s palaces which provide a reminder of Orkney’s importance in the medieval times.


In many ways Kirkwall for centuries has been an important transport hub and still is, bus routes go across mainland Orkney and the port for ferries to Aberdeen, Shetland and the North Isles. Kirkwall Airport, with links to Scotland, Shetland and in the summer months Norway, is only three miles from the town.


In the short time we were in Kirkwall, we managed to enjoy some of its fascinating history and could understand that it was an important place in many ways because of its unique landscape. Even the shops were quite quirky which made a change from the often sterile high streets in the UK.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.

The Old Fogies go Cruising



Before we took the grandchildren to Lalandia, Mr Curmudgeon had in his words ‘found an expedition for us to go on’, as you are aware I am always worried when Mr Curmudgeon says something like that.

‘Okay’ I say, ‘what is it then’?

‘It is a cruise’ he piped up.  I looked at him because we had always said we would never cruise again after our last P and O cruise where we did not really enjoy our life on the ocean wave.  Having saw my expression he continued, ‘It is not like the last one, this one is more of an adventure into the Arctic Circle’, he proclaimed.  ‘It is for 17 days, and it goes to northern Norway and northern Russia, it will be fantastic’ he says gleefully.


Having given me the details he looked expectantly for my nod, so he could book it, ‘it is really good value’ he says, to make me decide in its favour. Having agreed, we booked the holiday it is with Cruise and Maritime Voyages on their ship, the Marco Polo.


Arriving back from Lalandia on Friday, we give the grandchildren back and we have Saturday to prepare for our cruise!  Sunday dawns bright and clear, and we start packing, luckily, we are taking different clothing on the cruise as I suspect it will be quite cool in the Arctic Circle and we will need our thermals.


Having packed and cleaned up, I do so hate coming back to an untidy house, we are now travelling to Tilbury docks.  We take the DLR to Limehouse and catch the C2C train direct to Tilbury Town.  It is quite a pleasant journey passing Lakeside shopping centre, going through Grays and finally reaching Tilbury, it doesn’t look to salubrious, no taxi rank so I phone for a taxi and we wait for it to arrive to take us to the London International Cruise Terminal.


When we arrive at the Cruise Terminal, our cases are taken from the taxi by a nice young man who then points us in the direction of where we need to go.  Luckily for us, there are not many people waiting about, so having completed our medical questionnaire, we proceed to check in.  Getting our shore passes, and then registering our passports we proceed on to the ship.  I have got to say that the checking in process was excellent, and although the terminal building looked a bit run down on the outside, inside it was quite pleasant.


Having checked in, embarked (that is the correct word) and located our cabin, I was most surprised to find that our suitcases, were already there.  This was quite unexpected as I thought it would be like P and O where we had to wait about 2 hours for our cases to arrive.  Jose our cabin steward introduced himself and we all shook hands.  Jose is from Goa and was very friendly and helpful explaining the way the cabin stewards worked.  I cannot say I was too impressed with the cabin, it was small and had port holes rather than a window, but on the plus side it had good storage and we were able to stow away all our clothing successfully.


Jose had told us that lunch was being served in the Marco Polo restaurant, so we went aloft to find the way and eat a little before our dinner tonight in the Wardolf restaurant.  After a spot of lunch, we wandered around the ship or is it boat, I always get confused, to locate everything.


The Marco Polo was built in the 1960’s so it is not one of the blocks of flats on sea type of cruise ship, it has more character and is all the better for it.  Quite small in comparison with the P and O liner we went on, I immediately thought this will be okay, even at first glance the passengers seemed less precious and looked like a more diverse mix of people.


Eventually the ropes are released and the Marco Polo glides into the Thames Estuary and we are off on our great ‘expedition’.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.


The Old Fogies go to Legoland in Billund, Denmark


Billund and Denmark is of course the homeland of LEGO (even Billund airport was once owned by LEGO) and it was only a short walk from Lalandia to Legoland. When we arrived at the large entrance, the girls began to get excited and we got in line.


One of the great things about visiting a Legoland theme park is that they do allow access to the first part of the park before the main part is open. This allows the children to run around the various attractions rather then getting bored and restless standing in lines.


We handed the oldest granddaughter, the map of the park and told her that it is always a good idea to go to the furthest part of the park first because the queues would be shorter.

She followed these instructions to the letter and when we arrived at the large water raft we were first in line, Mrs Nice is not a great fan of these types of rides but was game enough to try this one. It had a Viking theme and I am always amused that Vikings in the UK are viewed as plundering murderers and pillagers, whereas in Scandinavia, they are viewed as quite jolly explorers.


The ride was quite gentle until we reached a large platform that transported our ride up to a great height before descended at some speed until we crashed with a splash into the finish. Only slightly damp we went to the next ride. This was in a castle and Mrs Nice decided to sit this one out. The first part of the ride involved a gentle meander through the castle looking at various jolly scenes, however the scene changed when you get outside and you realise you are on a massive rollercoaster. Just as we reached the top, the heavens opened and a torrential downpour soaked every one on the ride. If the ride was a little scary before, suddenly it became terrifying.

When we got the end, I was soaked and shaking, the girls were laughing and jumped off looking for the next ride. Mrs Nice had sheltered from the rain and said ‘are you wet’, I was tempted to throw her into the nearby pool.

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Of course, the fun never ends in these type of places and we made our way to another scary ride in the Arctic section.

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One of the joys of Legoland is that they only really cater for the 3 to 12 years old and there is plenty to keep that age group entertained. As we made our way back to the centre of the park, the crowds got larger and the queues got longer.


As well as rides, there are plenty of imaginative Lego sculptures all around the park and various attractions that offers the chance to win prizes. Some of the prizes included very large doughnut toy and a life-size husky toy which you saw people carrying around the site.


The only substantial queue was to go on the Ninjago ride but once again Lego think about the small details because in the queue the adults walk around the lines but the children can play with Lego bricks and other things provided. This takes away a lot of the stress of having excited children with nothing to do but wait.


The only very disappointing attraction was the Sealife Atlantis Aquarium which was just a small aquarium with limited appeal.


This was the first Legoland when it opened in and I suspect it was very different in those days, LEGO has been one of the great success stories with over 400 billion bricks sold since 1949. Part of their success is knowing their customers and the parks unlike many of competitors know that it is the small details that make all the difference. In Legoland, there is always something to see and look at and it is not a question of hours of queues and frustrated children.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.

The Old Fogies go to Lalandia in Billund, Denmark

As is traditional in our family, the grandparents always take the grandchildren on holiday during the long summer vacation.  This year Mr Curmudgeon asked our granddaughters what type of holiday they wanted to do.  The eldest quickly piped up that she would like to go to a water park with big slides and waves.  ‘OK said Mr Curmudgeon I will see what we can find’.

Having browsed the internet, Mr Curmudgeon looked a bit concerned, we could go to Billund in Denmark he said, there is a place called Lalandia that has a large indoor water park and something called Monky Tonky Land as well as a ski slope and ice rink and it is right next door to Billund Legoland, what do you think he asked me.


I said what is the cost, you know Scandinavia is very expensive.  Not too much Mr Curmudgeon said, we have to fly from Heathrow (Oh I sighed) but we can stay at Lalandia which is only 3 kilometres away from the airport.  OK I said, let’s do it, go on book.

The next time we saw the granddaughters we told them about Lalandia and showed them the internet page, they said it looked just what they were looking for, score 1 to Mr Curmudgeon.

The day eventually arrived that we would take the grandchildren to Lalandia in Denmark for our traditional summer break with them.


Flying from Heathrow why is it so difficult ? The Piccadilly line is painfully slow, and Heathrow is some 20 stops from Green Park, but hey ho we are off. Our flight time was 4.00 pm a bit late for us, but never mind the grandchildren are very excited.  Arriving at Heathrow, there is a 24-minute delay on our flight, I looked at Mr Curmudgeon and raised my eyebrows, yet another nail in the coffin of easy travel.

Anyway, eventually we get on the plane and get ready for departure, we are travelling British Airways, and I was shocked and surprised that suddenly they are charging from coffee, drinks etc.  This is very bad, as British Airways was always our first choice, even though it is a bit more expensive you usually do get a coffee and biscuit.  The pilot appeared to make up a bit of time as we arrive at Billund airport just after 7.00 pm Danish time.  We find a taxi and we then drive for a few minutes to Lalandia holiday site. 


Lalandia is an indoor complex with a number of different attractions and with an artificial bright blue sky above, everyday is a nice day ! Although the service centre is not open, we go to the sports bar and they ring through to alert the service desk staff to our arrival. 

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We then book in and are given our wrist bands for the park.  Our ‘chalet’ is number 215, so with suitcases and girls in tow, Mr Curmudgeon and I get on the small transport train, it is a bit of a tight squeeze and off we go to our chalet.


At the trains last stop, we disembark and look to try to find our chalet, my first thought when I saw the accommodation was WOW, these look fabulous all wood of course but large and spacious. 


Our youngest Grandchild when entering our particular chalet, uttered the word ‘Awesome’ and it was, two bedrooms, a large living space, which included, the kitchen area, seating area, dining area, as well a patio area, not forgetting the bathroom.  The chalet is not only spacious it is well designed and has everything you need, except as our eldest grandchild said, salt and pepper, this lost it a point in her eyes and she only gave the chalet a 9!


One of the drawbacks, is that you have to make up the beds yourself, you can hire linen from the centre or bring your own, we had decided to bring our own, so the first thing we needed to do, bearing in mind that it was now nearly 9.00 pm was to make the beds up. 

It had been a long day, and after a drink and a small snack we all decided to retire for the night, so we would be ready for the big day at the Aquadome tomorrow. 

The morning arrived and after a going to the supermarket and getting some cereal for the children and milk for Mr Curmudgeon and my coffee, we sit down and have some breakfast.  Then donning our swimsuits under our clothing we catch the 9.30 am train from the terminus for the 10 minute very slow ride to the centre.


Along the way the children play on the various small parks around the site, there is truly a lot to do around the Lalandia chalet sites, with lots of space for running and playing.


Arriving at Lalandia main entrance, we all get off the train and then go into the centre.  The Aquadome is on the right at the top, we are a bit early so we look around Polar world, which is interesting, but at this time it is not really fully open, we will need to come back and look again.


The wristbands that everyone wears are very good, they allow entrance (electronically) to all the areas and also will lock and unlock your chalet door, WOW the grandchildren feel that this is really High Tech.


10.00 am and we use our wristbands to get into the Aquadome site, Mr Curmudgeon goes upstairs, and I take the girls downstairs.  Again the wristbands are used to lock your locker, we discard our clothing putting it in the locker and closing it with our wristband.

We then have to shower, they are very particular that you shower thoroughly I was sent back because I had not done my hair!  Oh dear, in trouble again.


We go through to the actual water area, and all you can say is WOW, there are numerous pools, warm ones, cool ones and some in between, the  girls want to go to the centre slides, where there is just numerous water spouts tipping unexpectedly onto you, plus to biggish slides and a number of smaller ones.  The girls run up the stairs followed by Mr Curmudgeon and me at a more sedate pace, down we all go, I got a bit disconcerted as I slipped and went down on my back and landed at the end as Mr Curmudgeon said like a stranded whale, he does know how to compliment one doesn’t he!

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I take the little one to a set of slides in the corner, these are quite safe and I feel confident that little one will be okay here, so I can just sit at the bottom and watch.  Mr Curmudgeon takes the eldest grandchild on the bigger slides, these look quite frightening to me, but the grandchildren show no fear.  In the end even little one went on them whilst Mr Curmudgeon came off quite green the girls showed no such issues, and played constantly up and down these enormous slides.

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The bell sounded for the waves to start, so we all pile into the wave pool and enjoy 15 minutes bouncing up and down, even I enjoyed that, and the eldest grandchild was in her element.


After about 2 hours we all had enough, so we went to change and met up outside the Aquadome, I then went to the supermarket, which is well stocked and reasonably priced, well you need to remember that Scandinavia is expensive compared to British prices, I picked up something for lunch and we went back to the chalet for a bit of down time.  The girls were running and jumping and still full of beans, maybe Mr Curmudgeon and I are a bit too old for this type of holiday but never mind only 3 big sleeps to go.

After lunch, we decide to walk back to the Lalandia site, this takes about 20 minutes, but the girls insisted that they try every play area on the way, they have a great time, running up and down the circular coloured hills, the sand and swings, the climbing frames, so it probably takes us about ½ an hour to finally reach the entrance.


We are now going to the indoor play area that is called Monky Tonky Land, this is a large space filled with different play areas and is completely safe and secure we spongy flooring and netting to protect the children.  Again, access is via a barrier which your wristband gains you entry. 

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The girls immediately take off their footwear and run into the play area with no concerns, Mr Curmudgeon and I take to a table and chairs at the side, and start to relax a bit, knowing that the girls will be safe whilst enjoying themselves.

There is a great rule at Lalandia, that you can only take photos of your own children, so it is quite fun but very secure.  Denmark appears not to be such a nanny state as Britain, while there is staff about, they are not intrusive, and responsibility really is in the hands of the parent (or in our case grandparent) I feel this is a good thing.


They play for a little while they appear to especially like the trampolines which are very good and allow children to bounce quite high.  The eldest especially liked these, but she also like the challenge of going around the whole complex in a timed way, Mr Curmudgeon is very good at this sort of activity encouraging and getting the best time possible. 

After a couple of hours, they are quite exhausted, and it is time for a drink of juice for them and a coffee for Mr Curmudgeon and me. 


There are some activities that are not included in the price of a Lalandia ticket (is anyone surprised, Mr Curmudgeon and I certainly wasn’t).  One such activity is the bungy trampolines, of course they had such a great time in Monky Tonky Land, they wanted to experience the bigger trampolines.  OK I said but this is the only time, you will not go on again.

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After collecting more food from the supermarket, I must really do a bigger shop, we went round to Little Vegas which is a game machine area, they are allowed the small change we have from our shopping trips which they play with for approximately 20 minutes then it is time to go back to the chalet for dinner.

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We walk back to the chalet going into the goat enclosure.  These goats are very tame, and are the small variety the girls really enjoyed stroking the goats and watching there funny leaps and bounds over the ground. Lalandia is a great place for families and has the added bonus of Legoland being next door. It does have a few idiosyncratic rules and regulations like bringing your own bedding but we think that this is because most people travel to the resort by car. If you are flying into Lalandia, it may be easier if you arrive earlier than we did, The Service center closes around 6pm and it is a bit of fuss to get your wristband. Both Lalandia and Legoland tend to cater for the 3 to 12 age group, although there is plenty for younger and older children as well. 

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.

The Old Fogies go to the San Siro Stadium in Milan


When we went racing at the San Siro Ippodromo, Mr Curmudgeon couldn’t resist a visit the San Siro Stadium could he, even though it was over 30 degrees in the sun, we took the relatively short walk to the stadium to have a look see, although as you can imagine I was not too keen.


The stadium is set in a large concrete area and stands four square and proud in the middle of the concrete plain.  To me the stadium itself looked very industrial, it was originally designed by architect Ulisse Stacchini and engineer Alberto Cugini in the 1920s but has been renovated a few times since. Mr Curmudgeon, guidebook in hand enlightened me by relating that the Chairman of A.C. Milan at the time Piero Pirelli, promoted the construction of the football stadium and the horserace course next to it. Although it is known around the world as the ‘San Siro’, the stadium is actually called the Giuseppe Meazza stadium, it was renamed in the 1980s after Giuseppe Meazza, one of the most famous Milan players.  


The stadium is rectangular in shape, different from the modern British stadium which tend to be oval and bowl like, the San Siro has four corners and a large number of circular walkways that lead to different levels of seating.  Mr Curmudgeon described these to me as tyres (tyres, Pirelli, there is a connection), I could see his point.


Mr Curmudgeon wanted to walk all round the stadium, I have already said it was over 30 degrees, he is obviously going a bit senile, but walk it we did and I was extremely pleased that we had.  At gate number 9 you can walk up and pay for a tour, cost of which was only Adults €17, Seniors and children (6-14) €12, Children under 6 are free, which is really reasonable.  We did not have time for the tour because of the horse racing, but the tours run every hour and allows you full access to the dressing rooms, pitch and hospitality.


The other place it allows access to is the shop, however, at gate 14 you can enter the shop, unlike British stadium the shop is inside the gate, so when we arrive at gate 14 we went in.  The stadium is home for both Milanese teams, AC Milan and Internationale and the shop is split into 2 distinct areas for each of the teams, the black and red of AC and the blue and black for Internationale, but the real joy of the shop is there is a window onto the pitch.  Mr Curmudgeon immediately got his camera out and started taking pictures of the pitch, covered for a concert at the time we visited, and the seating, which goes up an awful long way.  I am not sure you would get a good view of the match at the top unless you were using binoculars though.

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Having exited the shop, we continued around the stadium, finally reaching the point where we started, it had took quite a long time to traverse the stadium but it was worth it in the end.  Mr Curmudgeon forehead, which goes a long way back these days was bright red, I was feeling pretty smug because I had my trusty race day hat on.

Old Fogies Travels are the adventures of two elderly Londoners (The Old Fogies) as they explore their home town and travel around the world looking out for the strange, unusual and absurd.

Our articles are published on our blog but also listed on the website of our friends at Visiting London here.